“I'm tired of runnin' 'round lookin' for answers to questions that I already know
I could build me a castle of memories just to have somewhere to go
Count the days and the nights that it takes to get back in the saddle again
Feed the pigeons some clay
Turn the night into day
Start talkin' again, when I know what to say’”
I didn’t want to get off my fat ass but my friend who goes by Martin Luther (he’s always tacking notes to doors) had been nagging me for awhile now to get back involved in a cause. Causes like love, memories, and cereal start out great but if you’re not quick enough they get soggy, messy, and lose their magic. After years on the wrong side of losing political battles I considered myself apologetically beat off and ejaculated out of the realm of debate and participatory interest in politics. It is after all where most American’s reside and comfort is the new freedom in an age of inaction.
Government has become so large we are all nothing more than replaceable parts. The individual serves the master in return for a few luxuries and filtered cigarettes. I wish Woody Guthrie would have asked for just a bit more as feel as ripped off as the Native Americans who we also promised comfort and security too. Right now I’m nothing more than a rushed assembly line Model-AL that somehow got passed off as ‘ok’ by inspector #33, who was drunk on a sick cruel sense of humor, and rum. But here I am 30 years later a little broken down but still running. Running, running, running. Running from bill collectors, running from commitment, running from responsibility, running from causes, running from authority, running from madness, and most of all running from myself. I’ve spent my whole life running. All the running and looking over my shoulder does keep me semi-healthy and well stretched. Half of anything really is all a man ever needs.
This morning tacked to my door was a note that simply read:
“AFL, if you died tomorrow would anybody give a shit?”
Death and impact are heavy things to digest with a bum, freshly removed gull bladder, and a pint of whiskey already brewing deep inside. I tossed the note with a perfect Cutler like forward lob right into the trash bin by the mail box, as a black cat watched on unimpressed. I wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or a bad one but at that point…signs and direction meant I was back on the highway finally getting off that road nobody was traveling. When you’re on a strange road all alone the humanity in you seeks danger and you take the curves as fast as you can with a maniac laugh and deranged stare.
Net Neutrality, killer Flu Epidemic, and Health Care are the major issues of debate in this country right now. I’m going to be honest with you as I’m either stupid or to tired to lie pretending I understand these issues. I don’t know anything about any of these topics. Nothing. What I do know, is nobody seems to know what the fuck is going on and mass confusion is spreading like a California brush fire. Lady Liberty is way too busy filming a reality show based on tired and weak immigrants making a life here to mail back home to even try to decipher the madness. The American Dream is now an export made her and shipped off where home really is. I’m confused and completely uninformed for the first time in my overly opinionated life on the day’s topics. Not by choice either, as I’ve scoured the web and the news programs for answers but every piece of information has been written by the best liars money can buy. Information is no longer based in fact or fiction but rather spin and targeted demographics. Everything is owned and all the owners are now players in our toppling Democracy.
So here I sit an undereducated, under employed obese blob of Chicago confusion watching angry pus filled monsters spiting halitosis fire from their snarling grotesque dragon mouths as they fill the televisions and debate halls with their wickedness. Nigger, Kike, Honky, racist, Rape, sexual abuse, child abduction, pedophiles, murder, Democrats, Republicans, lairs, faggots, pig, cunt, Valarie Jarrett, Rush Limbaugh. Whichever word causes you the strongest feeling and makes you the maddest is exactly the kind of rhetoric the monsters are engaged in yelling as veins pulse and bust splashing everybody in the process contaminating them with a virus much worse than N1H1. Vicious ugly words now used as bombs causing so much noise decency cannot be heard over the explosions maiming the innocent and killing the indifferent.
A cause? How can a cause be found and fought for when every opinion or idea is trademarked and bought out by even bigger and more powerful company? This includes the news, the unions, and every other group whose responsibility is to protect the individual from the institute. We’re all volunteering for high priced designer label straightjackets. Grassroot causes are impossible to assemble without selling out to a ‘sponsor’ or collapsing in angry debate amongst itself. Who does confusion benefit? Confusion befits the fine folks already in control. A distracted nation is an easy nation to rule control and craft.
I don’t mean to sound like one of these fucking babbling conspiracy nut jobs but something doesn’t seem right. Perhaps it’s schizophrenic paranoia, fear mongering, or whatever vicious language and judgment you wish to write me off with. God’s greatest power was instilled into us –deep shit when you put your brain power to it -as we all have the ability to commence judgment. Maybe it’s time we start to examine how we use this ultimate power as I don’t think we understand its full impact yet.
The richest people of the left and the richest people of the right are crafting a brilliant dinner theater show that we’re all engaged in; just enough to pay attention, but not enough to get up from our overcooked Chicken Cordon Bleu and Rice. Fuck it the new season of LOST is starting, and this season stars you my liberal friend and me your conservative enemy. Will we ever get off this island without killing each other first? The battle of us versus them has turned magnificently into us versus us.
Yesterday I was at a diner I enjoy at the edge of my Gothic home of Chicago. A middle aged lady was having dinner with her aged mother. The topic of healthcare popped up and the older lady was against it, and had facts and reasons why. The daughter wrote it off as crazy talk and asked her if she’s been watching FOX news. The daughters face turned into a sour lemon grimace as she just shook her head in absolute disgust. “Yea, but they are the only ones against universal health care,” the mother said with such conviction.
The old lady nailed it. No matter if you hate FOX News or love them; if they vanished tomorrow only one side would be heard. Sandpaper is Democracy and when something is feed into congress the two sides’ fine sand it using friction and repetition until it’s something we all can agree on. Without opposition I assure you we all will lose. That’s true of both sides, without a liberal sanding this nation would have very little feeling, emotion, and would probably collapse under some evil corporation.
Hey, wouldn’t an epidemic causing health fears throughout the country benefit a side looking to pass a health care bill? I’m just kidding. But seriously both sides need to STOP ignoring other INDIVIDUALS because that’s the same thing as ignoring an image in the mirror. Anybody in Chicago whoever wants to sit down with me and talk issues or try to reach an actual middle ground my door is always open. Labels are a dangerous thing, and unless we start shedding them or devaluing them or pissing freely all over them until the ink smears and erodes into illegible nothingness, resentment is only going to grow between all fellow travels of this fine nation. Stop listening to the news. Stop listening to the parties. Start listening to each other.
Real communication is my only cause right now. Maybe Martin Luther is on to something with these door notes.